the crunchatizer

Ed Wood and Plan 9 from Outer Space

2008-05-15T09:15:00.000-07:00

So I recently came across a Tim Burton film that I had never seen before. I had heard of it, and I had looked around to try and watch it, and now I finally saw it.

And I must say... I don't know if it was worth it all.

It is about an old horror movie writer and director named Edward D. Wood, Jr. who, incidentally, was a straight transvestite. Odd enough, but what made it all worse was just how shitty his movies were. His "pride and joy" Plan 9 from Outer Space was dubbed "the worst movie of all time."

I liked it.

But I only liked because it WAS the worst movie I had ever seen. It was so terrible that it was comedic. There were terrible graphics, terrible lines, horrid actors, and it claimed to star Lugosi.
In case you guys don't know who Lugosi is, he was a, at that time, relatively known actor. He played Dracula in the American Broadway stage Production in 1927.

So Plan 9 from Outer Space was the movie that really made Ed Wood an infamous hack, and Ed Wood, the Tim Burton film, was an Academy Award winning representation of Ed Wood while he was making Plan 9.

In Ed Wood, Starring Johnny Depp, all of the errors are revealed and emphasized, and all the basic facts are true. Down to the specific woman's sweater that Ed loved to wear. It also depicted a few other films that Wood made, but I am having trouble procuring a free online version of them for you.

The Tim Burton film made Plan 9 hilarious. It was really what sparked me into watching the actual Plan 9. They are worth a watch and a laugh, but nothing more.

Enjoy!

Tim Burton's Ed Wood
Part 1:
http://www.tudou.com/player/player.swf?iid=6265365
Part 2:
http://www.tudou.com/player/player.swf?iid=6265378
Part 3:
http://www.tudou.com/player/player.swf?iid=6265387

Ed Wood's Plan 9 From Outer Space
http://video.google.com/googleplayer.swf?docId=
-7038656109656489183&hl=en&autoplay=1

Garden State

2008-05-07T10:36:00.001-07:00

So, as you would know if you were reading this, which I am sure no one is, I love movies. Though recently I've come to the conclusion that I REALLY love independent films and movies that no one I know has seen. There is this channel called IFC (Independent Film Channel) and every time I turn on my TV, it's waiting for me. I recently saw a Zach Braff (written, directed, and starring) movie called Garden State. I had seen it before at a friends house but I hardly watched it. I was far more interested in kicking her ass at foosball. I won.

So I caught it on IFC and I thought it was pretty good. Except the ending. Yeah, that shit would never happen. EVER.

The rest of the movie was kind of a typical “finding yourself” story, just with a few twists and differences that made it more interesting than most of the stories like that. Like every single movie put out there these days, there is someone falling in love and there is some comedy and some tragedy and a sprinkling of everything. It’s really quite typical, but different enough to be good.

Once again, the plot is right below, and the link to watch the video is at the bottom of the page. Don't like spoilers? Me neither. Go ahead and skip to the bottom.

Basically it starts off with a scene of a horrific plane crash. All of the passengers are screaming and crying and it is all in slow motion. The film moves across the dismal crowd onto Andrew Largeman (Braff) who, despite the situation, is stony-faced and calm. With a small flash the scene changes to Largeman in bed and the phone ringing. He doesn't bother answering it and the answering machine picks it up. It's his father telling him that his mother died and that he needs to come home for the funeral. He leaves Los Angeles and heads to his old home in New Jersey. During the funeral he stands away from a crying crowd just as calm as he was in his dream. He looks around during the funeral and sees a couple of gravediggers in the distance. He walks over there and recognizes them as friends from his past. He talks with them and they make plans to hang out. He leaves and goes back to his old home, where he has a short talk with his father where he tells him about these sudden headaches and they make an appointment for him to see a specialist. That night he finds his old motorcycle in the garage and drives it to the party that the gravediggers are throwing. There are lots of drugs being passed around and he is given a pill with a smilyface on it and after he swallows it the scene goes into a blurry mess. He wakes up the next morning with BALLS written across his forehead. He washes his face and heads to his appointment. In the waiting room he meets a girl named Sam (Natalie Portman) and she tells him that she is only there waiting for a friend. When he is called in to see the doctor the nurse says that she will be with Sam in a minute and Sam shrinks in her chair out of embarrassment for being caught in a lie.

After the appointment he sees Sam outside and he offers her a ride. During the ride they talk and it is revealed that Sam is a compulsive liar.

The next few days are a ride of parties, emotions, and weird places that I really hope don’t exist, especially the hotel scene. That bit made me hate hotels even more than I did before. And I LOATHE hotels. That’s why, whenever I stay there, I keep out of my room until I’m so tired that I am about to crash, and I leave right after I’m dressed in the morning.

It was decent in my opinion. But you have to decide for yourself. I could only find it in five parts, I hope you don’t mind. If I were you I would load them all in different windows because they take quite a bit of time before they are fully loaded. If you have them all set up then the flow will go a lot smoother and it will seem more like a real movie.

Here it is.

Part 1:

http://static.youku.com/v1.0.0235/v/swf/qplayer.swf?VideoIDS=

cc00XMzY5OTk2MA&embedid=-&showAd=0

Part 2:

http://static.youku.com/v1.0.0235/v/swf/qplayer.swf?VideoIDS=

cc00XMzcwMDA2MA&embedid=-&showAd=0

Part 3:

http://static.youku.com/v1.0.0235/v/swf/qplayer.swf?VideoIDS=

cc00XMzcwMDE2NA&embedid=-&showAd=0

Part 4:

http://static.youku.com/v1.0.0235/v/swf/qplayer.swf?VideoIDS=

cc00XMzcwMDI4NA&embedid=-&showAd=0

Part 5:

http://static.youku.com/v1.0.0235/v/swf/qplayer.swf?VideoIDS=

cc00XMzcwMDM3Mg&embedid=-&showAd=0

And don’t worry about the beginning. For some reason the first minute of the movie has delayed audio and it will catch up. Don’t refresh it or anything. That won’t do anything.

ENJOY!

Wristcutters - A Love Story

2008-04-27T10:30:00.000-07:00

So, yesterday, I had a few hours of nothing-to-do time between midnight and four, so I went looking for something to fill my time. I stumbled across this movie and had an emphatic feeling of "What the hell." I was a little skeptical about it cause it seemed like it would just be a wasted hour and a half of me watching some emo bullshit and I would regret it seriously afterwards. I mean, with a title like Wristcutters what else could I have guessed? But since I had the opportunity to watch it free, and I didn't see anything else on that was relatively interesting, I put it on and was ready to turn it off if it turned out to be guys in WAYtootight pants and those reverse-mullet haircuts. I was pleasantly surprised to find a smart sort-of-romantic comedy movie that made me think.

It starts with a scene of a depressingly messy apartment. The main character, Zia, is laying on his bed and when he gets up, he starts to clean the room up. After a short montage the disheveled room is neat and tidy, and Zia has changed from a dingy shirt to a dressy outfit. He walks into the bathroom and it cuts to him looking into the mirror with a slack and painful face. He looks at himself for a minute before collapsing onto the floor with his face resting in a pool of blood from his cut wrists. The camera flows from this gruesome scene to a picture of a beautiful girl on his desk. Zia starts narrating about how he thinks she cried at his funeral before falling for another guy. Then he says that after he killed himself he got a job at Kamikaze Pizza. It goes to show his new world, inhabited only by those that have offed themselves, and just how much more depressing this world is than the one he just left. Everyone has a sign of how they killed themselves, everything from scars to gaping bullet wounds, and when a new substantial character is introduced a short clip of just how they killed themselves is shown. While Zia is at his haunt of a bar, he meets Eugene. Eugene is a East European rock-star that Zia becomes good friends with after a short while. After a time in this dismal world with inhabitants incapable of smiling, he comes across one of the people he knew during life while grocery shopping. He informs Zia that the girlfriend who he loved and who drove him to suicide had also killed herself and that she was in this purgatory-ish place. Zia recruits Eugene into joining him on a road trip to find her. They travel in Eugene's beater and pick up a hitch-hiker named Mikal. Mikal claims that there is some mistake and that she should never have come here because she never committed suicide, and so she is looking for the people in charge. This trio of lost souls forms an uncommon bond, road-tripping through the afterlife and meeting many memorable characters along the way.

It's a very interesting watch. If you feel so inclined to see it, then you can see it for free at the link at the bottom of this screen. Enjoy.

http://static.youku.com/v1.0.0234/v/swf/qplayer.swf?VideoIDS=
XMTQ1ODU0OTY&embedid=NzEuMjE0LjM3LjQxAjM2NDYz
NzQCd3d3LndhdGNoLW1vdmllcy5uZXQCL21vdmllcy93
cmlzdGN1dHRlcnNfYV9sb3ZlX3N0b3J5Lw==&showAd=0

About me.

2008-04-26T14:43:00.000-07:00

I'm not really much of a blogger. Though, I am a huge fan of films. I love sitting down to watch a good movie with friends or on plane and bus rides. I have seen all the movies I think are worth it, and have a movie collection to rival anyone I know. I recently found a way to watch a whole library of movies online, for free. So, with this new gift, I decided to set up a way to pass movies on for you to watch. I have an opinion on about everything, so just expect me to express that opinion here. If you don’t like it, skip the filler and go straight to the bottom of my posts. That’s where I keep the links to the movies I’m talking about.

Well, there’s that. I hope you enjoy my free movie selections.
If you don’t, well, you only wasted time, not money.

I'm a pretty interesting person. Get to know me. You might like what i have to offer.

http://current.com/people/thecapn
http://www.myspace.com/jollyrogerrags
http://www.purevolume.com/listeners/kendalsaurousrex